Autism is not a disease or an entity. It is not something we should seek to eradicate. Rather, it is a way of being, a general term to describe how one relates (or does not relate) to the world. If we consider autism as an entity, a ‘thing’, then this leads us to develop programs that seek to transform the person into something that they are not and will not be. It makes us seek to alter the person through force, coercion, and manipulation.
Behaviorism has sought to modify the person, the existential approach rather seeks to understand. The way the autistic person behaves should be seen as a form of communication, possibly the only form of communication he may have to describe her joys, sorrows, or anxieties. The world of the autistic is often misunderstood, one can see the person waving their arms and see this as “strange” and in need of suppression. But if we look inward and explore the meaning behind this action, we may find that it is telling us something, it is indicative of how that person feels. It is one of the few ways to be able to share the experience of him.
I met a 5-year-old autistic boy who did not speak. He walked into the office and started banging his hands on the computer keyboard. The secretary’s immediate response, as is typical, was to suppress the behavior and make it go away. Instead, I told him to let him go. We had a ball pit in the center of the room, and I told the boy that if he wanted to keep hitting the keyboard, he would have to pick it up and throw it into the ball pit. He continued, I picked him up and threw him inside. He got out of the ball pit and walked over to the keyboard. This time, he didn’t hit the keyboard but reached out for it and then fell back into my arms to be thrown into the ball pit. He laughed and laughed and then uttered the words, “do it again.” He was impressed. Relationship was the key to this interaction and an emotional connection was forged. I entered his world, and he reciprocated and entered mine.
I worked with an autistic boy who was blind and had paralyzed legs. When he was frustrated and overwhelmed, he sometimes needed a helmet because he hit his head. Many would dismiss any attempt to engage with him as ‘too handicapped’ or ‘too troublesome’. But even here, he worked on evaluating his environment, seeking to alleviate those things that caused him anguish and overwhelm. And you were able to make emotional connections with him despite his challenges and differences. I let him take the lead and sometimes he would hold my hand and lead me around his house. Despite his blindness, she knew his surroundings by touch. He liked to listen to music and had a game he would play where he would cover himself with blankets and laugh. These were important emotional connections that should not be ignored.
A child with cerebral palsy may be autistic, a child placed in conditions of sensory deprivation may be autistic, a child exposed to a toxin may be autistic. Autism is simply a term that we have decided to use to label how a person has developed and relates differently to the world. If I am an American and I travel to a foreign country and I don’t know anything about the culture or the language, I am forced to fight. If I am an American traveling to a foreign country but have learned some of the language and culture, it will be much easier. This is the direction in which I believe programs to help autistic people should be heading. Not to upset the person, but to help them be themselves and at the same time have an understanding of the “mainstream” and be able to navigate through it.