I find that very few wives ask their husband if he is cheating in the heat of the moment. Many wives give this very careful consideration. After all, no one wants to falsely accuse someone of something as serious as infidelity. Also, if you are wrong and accuse your husband of this and he is innocent, you could seriously damage your marriage.
So many wives will watch and wait. They will collect evidence. And they will mount suspicions that she can no longer ignore. Sometimes they will work up the courage to face him, only to lose him again. Eventually she will either get to the point where they can’t take it anymore or she will do something that will make confronting him unavoidable. Still, sometimes the wife is still not absolutely sure that she is right. And then she will try to assess her reaction as further evidence that he is cheating.
When she doesn’t like his reaction, she will confront him about it as well, telling him that an innocent man wouldn’t act the way he is. After she settles the dust, she may wonder how an innocent man could act.
She might say, “My husband started acting weird about six weeks ago, shortly after he got a promotion at work. He started staying late at work. He started dressing a lot better. I caught him in the middle of the night.” texting someone at night. He was going to the office on weekends, which had never happened before. He started working out. Then one day I was running errands and I saw him in a restaurant with another woman. I don’t know. They were touching. But there was something so insinuating about their conversation and body language that I knew they were having an affair. I was so upset I didn’t even go near them. But that night when we were having dinner, I told him what I had seen. He was furious that I left without saying anything. And he was very angry that I would accuse him of such a lack of integrity. He said he is trying to fit into his new position, which means he has to work harder and dress better. He said the woman was a classmate downstairs and you haven’t even touched her to shake hands. He went on and on for half an hour and almost threatened me that he had better not bring it up again. My husband is generally a laid back guy. He is not someone who gets angry like that. His exaggerated response almost confirms to me that he is, in fact, cheating. But when I told him this, he says that the opposite should be true. He says that he is the innocent man who is angry. But anger is not common for my husband. I think he protests too much. How do men usually act when they are accused of cheating and, in fact, are guilty? Does an innocent man act differently than an unfaithful man?
reactions vary: Honestly, the reactions you get vary as do the personalities and the men themselves. Sometimes perfectly innocent men will tend to overreact, while guilty men will smoothly, calmly and convincingly claim their innocence. A guilty man may talk endlessly about the matter, while an innocent man will immediately change the subject. You can’t always tell innocence or guilt based on these reactions.
Body language can be revealing: Now, body language experts will tell you that there are usually always telltale signs that someone is lying. Someone who is lying will look away slightly. they will purse their lips. They will put their hands together or tense their shoulders. They will clench their jaws. Some will even smile when your words sound anything but happy. However, often the confrontation happens so fast that you can’t analyze the posture and facial expressions.
Look at their behavior in the future: One thing confrontation can do is shake the tree a bit. He knows what you suspect and now it will be interesting to see if he changes his routines. If everything is legitimately innocent, it cannot change. But if he’s cheating on you and he doesn’t care if you know it, you might see the same reaction.
make yourself visible: Here’s one thing I know for sure. An affair has a way out. People slide. Or they decide to confess. If he’s cheating on you, chances are you’ll find out eventually. But if he’s otherwise acting normal with you, he’s on the lookout, then it makes sense to try to make yourself visible by taking him out to lunch one day so maybe the other woman/co-worker can see that your marriage is very current and on-going. clue. If he is willing to let this scenario play out, then this would tend to indicate that he is not cheating on her and that he does not care if she sees him or knows that he is actively participating in her marriage.