When I was 17 years old, two teachers brought together a group of girls for a workshop. Teenage girls can be mean; the idea was that everyone had to write something good about each of the girls in the group. We did not volunteer for this, it was mandatory.
We went around in a circle. When it was the girls’ turn, a teacher took a note from the girls’ note bucket and read it to the group. After the teacher read what was on the paper, other girls could comment, as long as they agreed or had something else to say about the girl being appreciated.
When it was my turn, the teacher took out a piece of paper and read “She always acts happy. But everyone knows she’s fake. She has to stop acting so happy and get real.”
It took her a second to realize what she had said. Another girl yelled “that’s so true, it’s so fake I can’t stand it. Nobody can be that happy. Everybody knows it’s fake.”
I sat frozen and then ran to the bathroom. I felt like I had been kicked so hard in the stomach that I couldn’t breathe. What were they talking about? What the hell were they talking about?
One of the teachers came into the bathroom to check on me. “No, I am not ok!” I said. This was a turning point in my life.
You see, I was a happy person. Despite the emotional abuse in my family and being treated like a freak at school because I was so shy and rarely spoke, I was genuinely happy most of the time. The kind of happiness that comes from within. It clearly didn’t come from anything that happened outside.
I trusted people unless they gave me a reason not to. I assumed the best in people, even though I grew up in a family that taught us to be harsh and intolerant.
For a year and a half after that incident I became strong. I was as bad as I knew how to be. I got hard. I thought if I didn’t have friends being a nice person and if people thought my happiness was fake anyway, then maybe I could make friends if I was a bitch.
In fact, it worked. I had a social life for the first time. They invited me to parties and I learned to drink. I learned to say bad things about people and to gossip. I was negative, rude and disrespectful. I was horrible AND THAT was false.
So I was back to being me, a genuinely happy and kind person. A person whose energy radiates out into the world and has a positive influence.
The energy of a lightworker is appealing. Here are some examples that happen every day:
You are walking through a place where there are boys working in the afternoon sun. You know these guys must be tired and thirsty. They are silent. They don’t notice you. Some talk among themselves, not realizing that you are walking. A man looks up and forces himself to smile, his energy different from the rest of the crew. He does not say anything. He is a lightworker.
You are at a Rotary luncheon that your boss made you attend. You don’t know anyone; you sit at a large table. People introduce themselves, exchange business cards and talk about their companies. When the waitress comes over to take orders, half the people keep talking and ignore the waitress, others take notes or pull out their phones to check for messages. When the server reaches a particular woman, you feel a dynamic change. The woman and the waitress are really engaged. The conversation between them is noticeably different from everyone else at the table. That woman is fully viewing the server and there is a positive energy exchange. Light worker.
You’re at the airport with your two young children, flying home to visit mom and dad. Her husband is not there to help. You have just been informed that the flight is delayed. The kids are tired and you didn’t pack enough snacks to sustain them. It’s too far to walk to the airport snack bar. You know that the children will burst into tears at any moment. You’re barely controlling your emotions… You look up to see a janitor mopping the floor thirty feet away. He looks at you and smiles. His smile turns into a big old grin as he acknowledges your dilemma. He sees you. He sends you some of his energy. That’s all he took. light worker.
I had a really hard time trying to understand how being a lightworker is different from being an empath, a psychic, an energy worker. All of those things are part of me, but you can be those things without being a lightworker. And you can be a lightworker without having those other skills.
So what is it? What is the ‘essence’ of light work? It is offering your spirit, the energy of your soul, your pure love for life to the world without restrictions.
A lighthouse is a signal to those at sea… a lightworker is a guiding light to other souls; holding the flame and offering encouragement despite all attempts to extinguish it.